Yesterday I got a Twitter Follower who runs a rehab center in Bali. In their promo photograph, thatched huts perch on a hillside, overlooking a perfect waterscape. The message is clear – if you are RICH, you can get sober BETTER. In air-conditioned comfort with a kickass view.
I don’t mean to get melodramatic, but I thought of The Masque of the Red Death. So I went to Google and keyed in, “Luxury Rehab” for the hell of it. It’s actually a funny read: marketers trying not to sound superior or douche-y while enticing privileged boozers to their facilities in exotic climes. They tout five-star hotel look-alikes, horseback riding (the universal exercise of the rich), and “special needs” accommodations. They even hint that their “exceptional clients” will be more successful in recovery while ensconced in a “familiar” environment.
I’m no ascetic. I went to Canyon Ranch twice. And I REALLY want to go to Bali. But you’ve got to PUT IN THE HARD WORK to get sober, people. I’m just saying…
“And Darkness and Decay and the Red Death held illimitable dominion over all.”