The Ravings of a Madwoman…

Painting by Christy Thom

When I was little, I was privy to what happens when two strong, articulate people divorce badly. At a time when it was “not done” my Nana and Grandpa Howard severed their marriage. For the rest of their lives, they voiced (with hilarious vitriol) the wrongs each other had committed. Even as a child I intuitively knew, their passion for despising each other was somehow tied to their heartbreak; they were the embodiment of the thin line between love and hate…

Nana called Howard “his highness” and spun yarns about his boozing and carousing with a bevy of waitresses and hat check girls. Howard called Nana “harebrained” and recounted her most insane acts in what would become family legend. One Halloween, she rolled down her car window and challenged some thugs who’d cut them off, forcing Howard to defend her honor dressed as CoCo the clown. Once, before he was to pick up clients for an important meeting, she “decorated” his new Buick with thousands of gum-machine charms, attaching them to the upholstery with push pins.

I am telling you this for two reasons. First, Nana’s stories about Howard always involved his excessive drinking. And second, Howard used to wad Nana’s angry missives to him into a ball and mutter, “Ravings of a madwoman…” as he tossed them unread into a wastebasket.

You all know I drank a lot. In fact my drinking was a factor in my own divorce. What you don’t know, is that every time I sift through the chicken scratches and clippings and snippets in my “idea folder” I think to myself with a smile, “Ravings of a madwoman…”

It’s funny, the things a family passes down. It’s funny the memories that soften with age, curling warmly like old paper…

P.S. You will recall most of my family resides at the Shady Rest Cemetery in Flint. One of Nana’s last thoughts, was a reminder to the remaining members of the family, “DO NOT bury me next to his highness,” he having preceded her to the big, unforgiving divorce court in the sky,,,