Let go of the notion that alcohol is a treat – catherine gray

An inspirational letter from a friend who’s about to celebrate one year alcohol free

I love hearing from people whose lives have changed after quitting alcohol.

This letter is meant to provide inspiration to those who think that alcohol is a treat – or they will never have fun again without a drink.

Disclosure: Some of the links below are affiliate links, meaning, at no additional cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through and purchase. 

The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober

But before I share the letter, I also wanted to offer up this quote from Catherine Gray, author of The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober.

I mentioned Catherine in an Instagram Story this summer. – and we had a short conversation.

Here is what she wrote back after me telling her I have had lots of white knuckles moments in the beginning of this alcohol free journey. Thought I would share with you, because, it was during these moments that I still viewed alcohol as a treat.

Inspiring right? O.K. On to the letter from my friend:

“I once thought that quitting drinking was a punishment to me. I truly believed that I was going to miss out on all the fun, the romantic dinners, that I wouldn’t dance, that I wouldn’t belly laugh.

Boy, was I wrong.

Not drinking is a gift. I can clearly see that now. And I also know that I can have fun, that I am fun!

Now, I truly laugh because something is funny, I engage in conversation, and I truly connect.

Drinking blurred every little thing and detail for me, I was missing half,  if not all of the night. Piecing together forgotten moments the following day. Now, I clearly see things, I have so much more clarity and more hope and more honesty.

The Cutest, Quirkiest Little Treehouse

I’m up very early at the cutest, quirkiest, little treehouse with my dearest friends.

I decided that I was just going to relax and enjoy, just let it be. And, boy did I.

We got here right after lunch and explored the cute town. Anyway, the place is just the cutest, it’s literally a treehouse. It’s right on the water.

We made a fire and gathered around and shared stories and had conversations about our lives, things we’ve never really talked about. We talked about friendship and how we are truly besties.

I shared with them how some of my relationships have changed since I stopped drinking, I shared how I really miss one of my friends that I made at my kids school six to seven years ago who’s not really in my life anymore.

We all shared and all had concerns but hopes too. These girls know me, they support me, and make me feel loved.

Then a giant storm rolled in, white caps quickly covered the water and debris fell from the trees, we rushed up to the house, giggling as the fat raindrops bounced off our heads, that was fun too. We ended the night all snuggled on the couch and talking and laughing.”

This little sliver of contentment can be yours, too.

Change can be challenging. But it can also open doors to new experiences, unexpected adventures and peace of mind that is truly priceless. If this is what you are searching for in your life, I truly wish for you to find it.

A final word on inspirational literature

The post Let go of the notion that alcohol is a treat first appeared on Waking Up The Ghost - Alcohol Recovery.

Life-changing benefits of quitting alcohol. Are there any? Yes!

In fact, I started off wanting to address three benefits. But, during the process of writing this, I actually added three more to my list – BONUS!

If you’ve read any articles at all espousing the benefits of quitting alcohol, you’ve probably noticed a pattern. People talk about better sleep, rave about glowing skin and being able to shed weight quicker than the Tom Hanks character in the movie Castaway.

Of course, just the awesome benefits above are reasons enough to cut booze out of your life for even a little bit. But as I continue on this alcohol-free journey, there’s more to uncover! And is it worth it? It takes a lot of mental effort to change ingrained habits, but it’s just as satisfying as digging through three years’ worth of email to prove someone you were right.

Life-Changing Benefits of  Quitting Alcohol

O.K. So, now that we have great sleep, clear skin and weight loss as very possible side effects, let’s get on to some surprising benefits, shall we?

Benefit #1: Meal Prepping and Planning Becomes a Breeze

What Meal Prep Looks Like Before Alcohol Free Journey Began

I have never been an amazing cook in the kitchen. My husband and I were married for 6 years before we had kids so we mostly ate out all the time.

But I got more serious about improving culinary skills when I had my twin five-year old boys.

Every year, since the day they were born, I would place “meal prep like a goddess” at the top of my New Year’s resolutions list. And, every day since the day they were born, I have pretty much winged breakfast, lunch and dinner. If I even tried to plan out meals for the week, I would feel paralyzed at the grocery store trying to buy so many ingredients for recipes to last several days. And so I usually bailed on any plans I had.

What Meal Prep Looks Like After the Alcohol Free Journey Began

I am, in fact, a meal prep goddess.

I have the energy, enthusiasm and desire to be coordinated enough to look at recipes I want to try, make a list of all the ingredients and then cook things – like muffins, egg cups, roasted veggies and boiled eggs – all ahead of time. This week I splurged and had groceries delivered by a local store and it was awesome! We ate in mostly all week and I’ve felt happier and more in control of my diet (and my kids’ diets).

Benefit #2: ReDiscovering the Joy of Snail Mail

Experience with Snail Mail Before the Alcohol Free Journey Began

Shuffle through junk mail.

Ask myself three months in a row, “didn’t I already pay for that radiology bill?”

Wonder aloud how much Ryan, from Ryan’s Toy Review, is racking up now that he appears on my local fast food fliers AND the Walmart insert.

Experience with Snail Mail After the Alcohol Free Journey Began

I write letters like a woman who’s been sentenced for life in South Carolina’s Leath Correctional Institution. 

Now, I send notes because someone is starting a new, full-time job after being a stay-at-home mom for several years. 

It’s one of my favorite experiences to receive cards of encouragement and thanks from others I’ve connected with online.

Opening up the mailbox (to either send or receive) is so fun these days.

Benefit #3: A Sponge for All New Concepts

Quest to Uncover Educational and/or Entertaining Content Before the Alcohol Free Journey Began

I binge watch series, such as Homeland, House of Cards and immediately forget which episode was the last one I watched…until I’m 42 minutes into the episode and realized I have – in fact – watched it already.

Don’t get me wrong, I love to read. I love to experience new things. But, my nightly glasses of wine made me tired and unable to concentrate. And, usually, I just went to bed right after the kids did.

Quest to Uncover Educational and/or Entertaining Content After the Alcohol Free Journey Began

I stay up late into the night reading. While going on a run outside, I listen to a new and inspiring podcast episode. It’s fun to learn about what my boys are interested in (lately, carnivorous plants) and then absorb every detail there is to know. I sign up for online courses that teach me about travel blogging and trade investment strategies.

Benefit #4: More Mindful of Spending Money

Approach to Spending Money Before the Alcohol Free Journey Began

From fake eyelashes to new clothes and from toys for the boys to expensive makeup, I buy anything I think will make me feel good. I get a little rush spending money. And I get a rush always seeing packages at the door. My children are familiar with the Amazon-branded blue van complete with a smile.

Approach to Spending Money After the Alcohol Free Journey Began

Look, I’m not perfect about this. I mean, who doesn’t like to see packages at their door?!

I still like to buy things and experiences. But, I will say I’ve noticed I have less of a need to fill some sort of space I felt was there needing to be filled before. I’m more patient to explain the concept of money, patience and opportunity to my children. And I don’t think I need to buy anything for myself or for them that would change our level of comfort or contentedness.

Benefits #5: I Breath Easier

Anxiety Before Alcohol Free Journey

I live off tiny sips of air, as if a boa constrictor has wrapped around my chest.

Anxiety After Alcohol Free Journey

I’m embarrassed to admit I never made the connection between anxiety and my drinking. I took anti-anxiety medication, exercised daily, signed up for yoga classes and was just all around stumped that I still felt electrifyingly wound up all the time. Then, I discovered it was the booze. Because the anxiety disappeared as soon as I quit drinking.

I now enjoy BIG, FULL, DEEP BREATHS. I feel like I breathe so much easier these days. Anxious thoughts that used to wrap tightly around my chest are much farther and fewer between – and it’s all because I kicked my nightly wine crutch. .

Benefit #6: I get dressed a lot more

Outfit of the Day Before Alcohol Free Journey

For a while my routine was to get up, take off yoga clothes, take a shower, put on new pair of comfy clothes.

OOTD After Alcohol Free Journey

And while I’m not totally swearing off yoga pants forever, I noticed I actually put on real jeans, a nice top and shoes that don’t boast the benefits of cushioning! I don’t feel as bloated. My skin isn’t broken out like crazy. I’m feeling better about just being me in general – and want to look nice for myself.

I hope that if you are looking for inspiration or encouragement to quit drinking, that you’ve found something that motivates you in this message. I truly believe there are numerous life-changing benefits to quitting alcohol. You deserve to reap them all. Let me know if you have any questions. xo Kim

The post Life-changing benefits of quitting alcohol first appeared on Waking Up The Ghost - Alcohol Recovery.

How essential oils aid in sobriety

I love using essential oils as part of my sober toolbox!

Last year, I believed with my whole heart that wine was the only thing available in my handy little toolbox. But times change and so do people!

[Disclosure: Some of the links below are affiliate links, meaning, at no additional cost to you, I will earn a commission if you click through and purchase.] 

Essential Oils and a Sober Toolbox

Once I started reading books written by people who got sober, are in recovery or suffered from addiction, I noticed many of them mentioned the use of essential oils. For example, Bex Weller, author of A Happier Hour, wrote that she started to incorporate essential oils into a bedtime routine that had her looking forward to something after attending a special event:

“I put fresh sheets on the bed, and placed a new essential oil and a great book on my bedside table.”

Image courtesy of Young Living

Also, Holly Whitaker from Hip Sobriety added essential oils to her sober toolbox as a necessity, among rosary/prayer beads and good tea and healing music!

So I wanted to address how to incorporate essential oils into a daily regimen. And I really appreciate insight from Joy, of Lemon and Joy Life! Here are a few basics about what essential oils are – and how to use them. She also provides a few special blends that are great to promote relaxation and reduce stress. Follow her on Instagram at Lemon and Joy Life – and definitely reach out to her if you have any questions!

What are essential oils?

Image courtesy of Lemon and Joy Life

How to add essential oils to your sober toolbox

• open the bottle and take a whiff
• rub a drop in your hands, cup them together and breathe in
• diffuse them in a diffuser.

Image courtesy of Lemon and Joy Life

FUN FACT: Essential oils have been around since biblical times but they have had a resurgence in popularity in recent years and now you can buy them any where. They are not all the same, even if the label says “pure” or “all natural.”

According to Joy, Young Living has the Seed to Seal guarantee meaning they have the highest standards in every step of the process, starting with the best seeds, grown in optimal conditions, harvested at the optimal time, then distilled with the utmost care and precision and, finally, every batch of oils is tested in house and by a 3rd party with multiple tests to ensure every bottle of oil contains the correct amount the therapeutic constituents. Young Living has been around for 25 years and truly sets the standards for the industry.

So grab yourself a book, select your favorite essential oil and enjoy a little quiet time to yourself when you can. It will make all the difference in your alcohol free journey!

The post How to use essential oils for sobriety first appeared on Waking Up The Ghost - Alcohol Recovery.

If you took a class called Sober Prep 101, it would teach you how to prepare – both physically and mentally – for an sober vacation.

In fact, the best way to ensure success for an sober vacation is to prepare. It’s not something you should wing, especially if it’s your first attempt at a sober vacay.

Sober Prep 101

One of my friends went on vacation for a week and sent me this picture of her fridge. She wanted to take a sober vacation and thought the first day would be the most challenging. So she stocked up on her favorite soda water. I love this picture. Preparation is the key to success right?!

Here’s my friend’s note to me, talking about how she got ready for her sober vacation:

Grocery Store Prep

Mental Prep

It’s also a good idea to take some time to mentally prepare for your vacation.

• Envision yourself waking up early feeling refreshed and full of energy.
• Visualize yourself in situations where you are laughing and relaxed and enjoying yourself without a drop of alcohol.
• Go into the vacation with a positive mindset. Look at it as an opportunity to try new things – like enjoy and experiment with mocktails at the tiki bar!

If you’re looking for more inspiration, here’s a blog post I recently wrote about my very own alcohol free vacation at Wild Dunes in Isles of Palms, South Carolina. Also, check out Sandra’s story where she shared her experience in her very first sober vacation!

Remember, taking an intentional break from alcohol offers the opportunity to challenge, change and inspire you. You can always go back to your drinking ways, but why not challenge yourself to enjoy a new experience!

The post Sober Prep 101: How to stay sober on vacation first appeared on Waking Up The Ghost - Alcohol Recovery.