This is Sanford House. I’m SERIOUS. I might not ever leave…
Sanford House Drug and Alcohol Rehab and Recovery Center…
I’m very excited to be heading to Michigan today as a guest of the folks at the gorgeous Sanford House. Sanford House is a drug and alcohol rehab and recovery center for women, located in Grand Rapids. I write a monthly article for their website, and they are readers of Waking Up the Ghost, and kindred spirits: I am going to give a speech and a reading on Thursday night at an event they are hosting in my honor.
Yesterday I did what I always do before I have to get up in front of a number of my fellow human beings and say something of note. I panicked. Then I self-sabotaged. The mean girl in my head told me I was not qualified enough or smart enough or even pretty enough to get up and tell my story in such an august group, and for a moment I believed her.
She reminded me of the time I presumed to give a speech to several thousand members at an American Records Managers Association conference and bombed. I was giving a talk on Database Security, a subject I knew little about, and the ARMA crowd does not suffer fools. I wasn’t booed off the stage, but only because records managers are a quietly disdainful bunch. They did stage-whisper amongst themselves, take potty breaks and loudly rattle their bag lunches while I prattled on… There was the time I chaired the Cultural Council of Greater Jacksonville’s annual event and got so distracted by my jumbotron images, projected above the masses like Eva Peron, I stopped mid-speech and said something horrifying like, “I just love being surrounded by myself.” That misstep was probably due to the glass or two of wine I drank for liquid courage before my talk. The mean girl in my head even dredged up ancient history – recalling the time I peed my pants in third grade during a show and tell presentation…
And then I remembered I am actually uniquely qualified for this speaking engagement. I’m from Michigan, I’m a woman in recovery, I write a popular sobriety blog, I have done a lot of research on the subject of addiction and like Sally Field’s oft quoted infelicity in another public speaking embarrassment, “They like me. They really, really like me.”
I’ve got this covered.
