Maybe I’m just tired…
I am sure I have learned many things in the past two sober years. For example, I have learned to use the F-word less frequently (and with more effect), and I know how to make spaghetti squash*.
I have to admit, my two year anniversary is coming in like a lamb (or one of those cute baby goats in pajamas from the viral video), not like last year’s roaring lion of sober congratulation: I would not have even remembered it, except I got a gift in the mail yesterday with the message “do not open until July 28th” and I had to think about why. This morning, Lauren and Laura sent me texts to say they were “proud of me,” Kim called to say, “Miracles have happened this year,” and it reminded me again, today is an important day.
That is a good sign, right? The fact today is just another day for me? It’s not some harbinger of depression, or a foreshadowing of relapse? I feel a bit jumpy about being so blasé. Maybe I’m still kind of tired from last week and the weekend…
Anyway, the one thing I have learned about sobriety, two years gone, after all the booze and the bitterness, and the craving and the regret, and the sarcasm and the anger and even the atonement and the gratefulness is this:
Sober living is just a life worth living.
Lauren says, “I get that sober is just living for you Mom, but we celebrate birthdays and that is literally just surviving. So what are you doing tonight?” Okay, okay I’m waking up and I’m proud of myself.
Have a great day today.
*I am sitting here trying to think of something more exciting I have learned to do. I wish I could say I have mastered crop dusting, or twerking…
