When last we spoke, I was battling a tangled string of cheap Christmas lights in the top of a tree. Sober.
I would like to report that Christmas came in spite of my clumsy, fruitless attempts to dazzle. Lauren and Jon Jon and Kallie arrived without incident, the rain stopped (although the ‘crick did rise) and they miraculously recast the lights and extension cords – creating a pyrotechnic display so fine the neighbors called to say it looked like our backyard might be on fire…
I got Apple TV, candles, a snake a bite kit, a selfie stick (very excited about that) and a glut of presents so thoughtful I am shocked and grateful. Jon Jon is chopping wood.
We went back to the winery for a tasting. When the owner poured the first flight and my family downed it like they were doing shots at a country bar he said, “Well alright. This is how it’s gonna be…” Jon Jon said he was following Lauren’s lead as she’d been to a wine tasting in Australia. The winery’s finest is called “Deliverance” (the movie was made here) and the owner’s wife said, “This wine is so good it will make you squeal like a pig…”
We’ve been hiking. Our group is so eccentric – only Jon Jon looks like he fits in – I was reminded of the long exodus in Jurassic Park where almost everyone gets eaten and I said, “Let’s get this movable feast on the road.”
I never once wished for a glass of wine.
We have all agreed this is the best Christmas ever.
Today I’m not drinking, because we’re going to the dump and hiking with our new boots and going muddin’ – oh yeah I said it…
How come you’re not drinking?
