Temperance in a Tipsy World…

The Bahamas, a BAR, and temperance – not for the faint of heart…

Temperance is the espousal of moderation, marked by personal restraint. That sounds like me… One Christmas, my daughter (who is many things, one of them ironic), gave me a stemmed glass that holds an entire bottle of wine, and a change purse with the embroidered words “Live Simply”.

The fact is, I am not a natural ascetic. My life has always been chaotic, loud and abundant – I like stuff. My temperance from alcohol has been an interesting ride; almost two years of blithe sobriety while just about everyone else I associate with drinks.

There are two schools of thought when practicing abstinence (even the word sounds priggish and old fashioned). One, is to disassociate from all things that remind you of the boozy days: empty the liquor cabinet and unfriend your drinking buddies. The other is to find a way to live with it: go to bars, keep wine in the rack and drink gassy water and cranberry instead of Chardonnay. I have chosen the latter.

I used to date a guy who smoked. After you’ve been in a car with a smoker who cracks a window, or watched them puff while having their morning coffee, or cringed as they flick their butts into a pristine Exuma Sound, you are done with smoking.

I am not as militant about not drinking, until people get drunk.

Carrie Nation

I am not against drinking. I am against alcoholics drinking. I am also against shit-faced, repetitious, slurring, staggering, puking drinking. Even during Florida/Georgia weekend or St. Paddy’s Day in Jacksonville Beach. It is not cool people. A pub crawl does not mean “get so potted you cannot stand upright”.

And for those of us who are bushy-tailed sober (and glancing surreptitiously at our watches), the fifth time you start the same story with, “Okaaaayyyy, like get this, I mean so I was like, wait…..wait…  I mean like um, we were – hey listen, I mean it was… like… OH MY GOD and so we, wait like…,” we are no longer listening.

Temperance, not intolerance Marilyn…  If I start carrying a bible and an axe, somebody please shoot me.